Ask the viking

comedycentral:

Click here to watch Samantha Bee and Jason Jones talk about this classic segment on The Daily Show Correspondent Spotlight: Behind the Spotlight.

internal-acceptance-movement:

10 WAYS WE BODY SHAME WITHOUT REALIZING IT:
1. Saying Things Like, “She Would Be So Pretty If…” 
Have you ever uttered anything along the lines of, “But she has such a gorgeous face” or “She would be more beautiful if she put on a few pounds”? You are limiting your idea of beauty to a cultural stereotype. Beauty is not conditional. If you can’t say anything nice, maybe it’s time to learn how.
2. Judging Other People’s Clothes 
While it’s fine for you to choose clothes any way you want, nobody else is required to adhere to your style. The person wearing that outfit is, in fact, pulling it off, even if you think she’s too flat chested, big chested, short, tall, fat or thin. And fat people don’t have to confine themselves to dark colors and vertical stripes, no matter who prefers it. And spandex? It’s a right, not a privilege.
3. Making It an ‘Us vs. Them’ Thing 
The phrase “Real Women Have Curves” is highly problematic. Developed as a response to the tremendous body shaming that fat women face, it still amounts to doing the same thing in the opposite direction. The road to high self-esteem is probably not paved with hypocrisy. Equally problematic is the phrase “boyish figure” as if a lack of curves makes us somehow less womanly. The idea that there is only so much beauty, only so much self-esteem to go around is a lie. Real women come in all shapes and sizes, no curves required.
4. Avoiding the Word “Fat”
Dancing around the word fat is an insinuation that it’s so horrible that it can’t even be said. The only thing worse than calling fat people “big boned” or “fluffy” is using euphemisms that suggest body size indicates the state of our health or whether we take care of ourselves. As part of a resolution to end body shaming, try nixing phrases like “she looks healthy,” or “she looks like she is taking care of herself,” and “she looks like she is starving” when what you actually mean is a woman is thin.
5. Making Up Body Parts 
We could all lead very full lives if we never heard the words cankles, muffin top, apple shaped, pear shaped or apple butt ever again. We are not food.
6. Congratulating People for Losing Weight 
You don’t know a person’s circumstances. Maybe she lost weight because of an illness. You also don’t know if she’ll gain the weight back (about 95 percent of people do), in which case earlier praise might feel like criticism. If someone points out that a person has lost weight, consider adding something like, “You’ve always been beautiful. I’m happy if you are happy.” But if a person doesn’t mention her weight loss, then you shouldn’t mention it either. Think of something else you can compliment.
7. Using Pretend Compliments 
“You’re really brave to wear that.” By the way, wearing a sleeveless top or bikini does not take bravery. “You’re not fat, you’re beautiful.” These things are not mutually exclusive — a person can be fat and beautiful. “You can afford to eat that, you’re thin.” You don’t know if someone has an eating disorder or something else; there is no need to comment on someone’s body or food intake. “You’re not that fat” or “You’re not fat, you workout,” need to be struck from your vocabulary. Suggesting that looking fat is a bad thing is also insulting.
8. Thinking of Women as Baby-Making Machines 
One of my readers mentioned that her gynecologist called her “good breeding stock.” Also awful: “baby making hips.” Worst of all is when people ask fat people when they are due. As has famously been said, unless you can see the baby crowning, do not assume that someone is pregnant.
9. Sticking Your Nose in Other People’s Exercise Routines 
A subtle form of body shaming occurs when people make assumptions or suggestions about someone’s exercise habits based on their size. Don’t ask a fat person, “Have you tried walking?” Don’t tell a thin person, “You must spend all day in the gym.” I have had people at the gym congratulate me for starting a workout program when, in fact, I started working out at age 12 and never stopped. I had a thin friend who started a weight-lifting program and someone said to her, “Be careful, you don’t want to bulk up.” How about not completely over-stepping your boundaries and being rude and inappropriate?
10. Playing Dietitian 
If you have no idea how much a person eats or exercises, you shouldn’t tell her to eat less and move more or suggest she put more meat on her bones. (Even if you do know what she eats, don’t do it). How do you know she’s looking for nutritional advice from you or the newest weight-loss tip you saw on Dr. Oz?
Written by: Ragen Chastain

internal-acceptance-movement:

10 WAYS WE BODY SHAME WITHOUT REALIZING IT:

1. Saying Things Like, “She Would Be So Pretty If…” 

Have you ever uttered anything along the lines of, “But she has such a gorgeous face” or “She would be more beautiful if she put on a few pounds”? You are limiting your idea of beauty to a cultural stereotype. Beauty is not conditional. If you can’t say anything nice, maybe it’s time to learn how.

2. Judging Other People’s Clothes 

While it’s fine for you to choose clothes any way you want, nobody else is required to adhere to your style. The person wearing that outfit is, in fact, pulling it off, even if you think she’s too flat chested, big chested, short, tall, fat or thin. And fat people don’t have to confine themselves to dark colors and vertical stripes, no matter who prefers it. And spandex? It’s a right, not a privilege.

3. Making It an ‘Us vs. Them’ Thing 

The phrase “Real Women Have Curves” is highly problematic. Developed as a response to the tremendous body shaming that fat women face, it still amounts to doing the same thing in the opposite direction. The road to high self-esteem is probably not paved with hypocrisy. Equally problematic is the phrase “boyish figure” as if a lack of curves makes us somehow less womanly. The idea that there is only so much beauty, only so much self-esteem to go around is a lie. Real women come in all shapes and sizes, no curves required.

4. Avoiding the Word “Fat”

Dancing around the word fat is an insinuation that it’s so horrible that it can’t even be said. The only thing worse than calling fat people “big boned” or “fluffy” is using euphemisms that suggest body size indicates the state of our health or whether we take care of ourselves. As part of a resolution to end body shaming, try nixing phrases like “she looks healthy,” or “she looks like she is taking care of herself,” and “she looks like she is starving” when what you actually mean is a woman is thin.

5. Making Up Body Parts 

We could all lead very full lives if we never heard the words cankles, muffin top, apple shaped, pear shaped or apple butt ever again. We are not food.

6. Congratulating People for Losing Weight 

You don’t know a person’s circumstances. Maybe she lost weight because of an illness. You also don’t know if she’ll gain the weight back (about 95 percent of people do), in which case earlier praise might feel like criticism. If someone points out that a person has lost weight, consider adding something like, “You’ve always been beautiful. I’m happy if you are happy.” But if a person doesn’t mention her weight loss, then you shouldn’t mention it either. Think of something else you can compliment.

7. Using Pretend Compliments 

“You’re really brave to wear that.” By the way, wearing a sleeveless top or bikini does not take bravery. “You’re not fat, you’re beautiful.” These things are not mutually exclusive — a person can be fat and beautiful. “You can afford to eat that, you’re thin.” You don’t know if someone has an eating disorder or something else; there is no need to comment on someone’s body or food intake. “You’re not that fat” or “You’re not fat, you workout,” need to be struck from your vocabulary. Suggesting that looking fat is a bad thing is also insulting.

8. Thinking of Women as Baby-Making Machines 

One of my readers mentioned that her gynecologist called her “good breeding stock.” Also awful: “baby making hips.” Worst of all is when people ask fat people when they are due. As has famously been said, unless you can see the baby crowning, do not assume that someone is pregnant.

9. Sticking Your Nose in Other People’s Exercise Routines 

A subtle form of body shaming occurs when people make assumptions or suggestions about someone’s exercise habits based on their size. Don’t ask a fat person, “Have you tried walking?” Don’t tell a thin person, “You must spend all day in the gym.” I have had people at the gym congratulate me for starting a workout program when, in fact, I started working out at age 12 and never stopped. I had a thin friend who started a weight-lifting program and someone said to her, “Be careful, you don’t want to bulk up.” How about not completely over-stepping your boundaries and being rude and inappropriate?

10. Playing Dietitian 

If you have no idea how much a person eats or exercises, you shouldn’t tell her to eat less and move more or suggest she put more meat on her bones. (Even if you do know what she eats, don’t do it). How do you know she’s looking for nutritional advice from you or the newest weight-loss tip you saw on Dr. Oz?

Written by: Ragen Chastain

Whenever I hear the "Women are paid $.78 for the man’s $1" I flip it around.

Men make $1.22 for every woman’s $1.

It interests me that even the most common simple measure of gender inequality is firmly based on male-as-normative …

bisexual activist and queer theory blogger Patrick RichardsFink (via fliponymous)

this is an interesting point, although mathematically inaccurate: assuming the women:men, 0.78:1 ratio is correct, men make $1.28 for every woman’s $1

(via haveyouevercriedwolf)

White people are still the ~standard so that’s not so revolutionary.

(via dykeprivilege)

A white man makes $1.34 for every dollar that a black man makes

A white man makes $1.52 for every dollar that a latino man makes

A white man makes $1.24 for every dollar that a white woman makes

A white man makes $1.44 for every dollar that a black woman makes

A white man makes $1.67 for every dollar that a latina woman makes

That’s some bullshit right there.

(via little-bulldozer)

If you take away anything from this website, please let it be what I bolded ^

(via buxombibliophile)

Let’s take it a step further. For every hour a white man works, a black woman has to work 86 minutes to earn as much money. 57.6 hours a week compared to the white man’s 40.

Take it another step further. Assuming a Monday through Friday, 9 to 5 job, from Thursday 12:45pm through Friday end of business, a white man gets paid for his work, a black woman is, by comparison, working for free.

(via fuckyeahcracker)

See also: Why intersectionality is REALLY FUCKING IMPORTANT OK.

(via geekygothgirl)

samanthabarxx:

"I’m a woman and I’m not offended by this, clearly it isn’t sexist!"

wow I didn’t realise you were the singular spokesperson for 3.5 billion people of different ages, races, religions, backgrounds, sexual orientations, social classes, and cultures, I’m so sorry

chubby-bunnies:

babyyyyfat:

sushispook:

sagansense:

mr-leach:

Some things I’ve learned in the CBT clinics I’ve been going to regarding anxiety that I thought might be helpful to some.

Pay it forward.

If you play on someone’s phobias for a laugh, I will fucking shank you in the nadgers.

This

As someone who has diagnosed GAD, Social Anxiety, OCD, a legitimate phobia called Ranidaphobia and other mental health issues such as Depression and Borderline Personality Disorder- posts like these mean a lot. Thanks to the OP x

knowhomo:

 

LGBTQ* Theory Books (You May Want) To Know

  • Feminism is Queer: The Intimate Connection between Queer and Feminist Theory - Mimi Marinucci
  • Mad for Foucault: Rethinking the Foundations of Queer Theory (Gender and Culture) - Lynne Huffer

  • Gender Trouble: Feminism and the Subversion of Identity - Judith Butler
  • Queer Indigenous Studies: Critical Interventions in Theory, Politics, and Literature (First Peoples: New Directions in Indigenous Studies) - Qwo-Li Driskill (Editor), Chris Finley (Editor), Brian Joseph Gilley (Editor), Scott Lauria Morgensen (Editor)

  • Please Select Your Gender: From the Invention of Hysteria to the Democratizing of Transgenderism - Patricia Gherovici 

     

  • Queer Cowboys: And Other Erotic Male Friendships in Nineteenth-Century American Literature - Chris Packard

     

  • Aberrations In Black: Toward A Queer Of Color Critique (Critical American Studies) - Roderick A. Ferguson

     

  • Queer Girls in Class (Counterpoints: Studies in the Postmodern Theory of Education) - Lori Horvitz 

thegayteen:

somewhereoverthebarricade:

Before I had tumblr I had no idea there were any sexualities other than heterosexual and homosexual. I never considered gender inequalities still existed.

That doesn’t mean I was purposely trying to discriminate or upset people.

There is a difference between being just ignorant of something and purposefully discriminating.

Give someone a chance to learn and be enlightened before you slam them as rude, horrible people

god bless

flightcub:

totalitarian dystopian future lit is like “what if the government got so powerful that all the bad stuff that’s already happening ALSO HAPPENED TO WHITE PEOPLE?”

*rape joke*
MRAs: haha
*prison rape joke*
MRAs: haha
*Michael Jackson rape joke*
MRAs: haha
*Justin Bieber rape joke*
MRAs: haha
Feminist: You shouldn't joke about rape.
MRAs: Shut the fuck up, don't infringe on my free speech, bitch
Feminists: Approximately 1 in 6 men experience sexually assaulted in their lifetime. Here are some ways you can donate and volunteer. Here are some resources for male sexual assault survivors.
MRAs: ......
Feminist: Approximately 1 in 4 women experience sexual assault in their lifetime. Here are some-
MRAs: MEN GET RAPED TOO HOW DARE YOU IGNORE THE POOR MALE RAPE VICTIMS, FEMINISTS ARE SO DISGUSTING THEY ONLY CARE ABOUT WOMEN WHO GET RAPED FUCKING HYPOCRITES